Raising a Genderless Baby

Boys and girls are different!  There I’ve said it and there is loads of science to support this.  I was reading a report in the newspaper yesterday, where parents Kathy Witterick and David Stocker, from Canada are raising their four month old child, Storm, to be genderless.  Only a small handful of people know the true gender of the child, which includes the child’s siblings and they are going to great length’s to keep it a secret.  For a split second I was embarrassed to be Canadian, but I can assure you most of us aren’t like this.  I’ve never heard such a load of bollocks in all my life.  Children aren’t lab rats and shouldn’t be treated as such.

I don’t agree on forcing gender roles or stereotypes on children and I salute people who try to instill independence in their children and encourage them not to conform without asking questions first.  But, I don’t know how living such a charade could possibly be good for the child.

I don’t know how or why parents would take such a risk.  I know this isn’t the first time it has been done as another family did it in the 70s and according to them it had no adverse affect on their children and that they are happy and well adjusted adults.  However, this is according to the parents, and I know loads of mum’s with devil’s spawn who claim they’re kids are perfect, I might be one of those.  I’d be interested to hear others take on the kids.

Gender, not sex, is a huge part of our being and I can’t help thinking that to ignore it is short sighted.  As a family, we haven’t intentionally resisted gender stereotypes.  However, Madame, for the most part wears gender neutral clothing as I have an irrational fear of pink and dresses.  We have ‘toys’ in our house not specifically boys toys nor girls toys.  In fact, we have quite a mix including cars, footballs, dolls, and babies.  I must admit though that she naturally migrates more to the so-called ‘girl’s’ toys and this hasn’t come from us.  I truly believe that it is part of her biological make-up.

Sorry and at the risk of sounding inarticulate, these parents are complete morons!  I would never suggest removing the children as this is the parent’s choice.  But, I can’t help thinking that they aren’t doing this for the benefit of the child but in fact are making a ridiculous social statement in an effort to seek attention.  I really hope it doesn’t backfire on them.

Instead of spending so much time and effort trying to hide the child’s gender, why don’t they use this energy to educate their children!

I would really like to hear what you think.










Author: mediocremum

A slightly older mum of one, who drinks far too much red wine and has an unhealthy obsession with her slow cooker. During the day she's an ICT Trainer, Social Media/Online Marketing consultant and does a bit of public speaking. Full Profile on Google+

15 thoughts on “Raising a Genderless Baby”

  1. “I really hope it doesn’t backfire on them.” It is the CHILD it will backfire on not the totally selfish and stupid moronic parents.


  2. That’s horrible. If they want to experiment on something, they should do it on themselves. Wonder if they live genderless or if they are allowed to be male and female? What a whole lot of rubbish…

  3. I read this earlier and didn’t know what to think. In some ways I see the principle but it is such an extreme view and more than a little attention seeking on the part of the parents. I like you dressed the children fairly neutrally – in fact when I married daughter was 13 months old and wore her very first pink dress with frilly socks and my mother held her up and said ‘look everyone it’s a girl!’ On the other hand my two friends had boys at the same time I had a girl and the differences were evident very early on. One day best friend and I bought her son and my daughter (both 3 and born a day apart) the exact same plastic tool set (you know the sort you get from newsagents on a toy stand for 99p). At my house the children started playing. Friend’s son got busy pretend sawing and hammering a dining chair…. daughter with the same tools began by addressing the chair ‘oo poorly chair shall I make you better’

    Nuff said.

  4. I agree with the parents. You say in your blog that “gender ,not sex, is a huge part of our being”. Well, it’s also a socially-imposed part that confines people. A guy who might happen to like braided hair, wear dresses, for example, cannot walk down the street without being stared/laughed at, let alone being taken seriously in jobs and have an equal chance to rise up the socioeconomic ladder. He has to give up some of his identity and conform. This is unacceptable. I agree that gender is a large part of our being, but it should be up to us to decide how masculine and feminine we want to be, not the society’s decision upon learning we have a vagina&boobs/penis.

      1. It is extreme from where the society is standing *now*. But I don’t think it’s extreme from where society should be.

        First, what parents mean by genderless is not “asexual”. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out whether you have certain body parts or not. And after a decade or so, everybody around the kids will also be able to tell whether they are male or female. So I don’t think there’s a lot of identity crisis going on as to whether they are male or female.

        Second, what the parents are trying to prevent is for people around the kids to behave from a gender perspective. Not automatically buying Barbies and dresses and cars and toys. Not allowing the children to automatically identify with the “males” and the “females” and how those two groups look and dress and behave. Allow the kid to develop his or her own taste instead of being socially reinforced into a category because of the behavior of everybody else.

        I do understand that this seems “radical” to many, but I think when we think about it, there is no logical reason why things like a guy wearing makeup should be so shocking to us that we won’t take a word out of their mouths seriously, why we are disgusted by women with leg hair and find it completely normal in guys, why masculine women and feminine men are so repulsive. Some of it might be “engrained” but I personally believe that a LOT of it is the society’s image of propriety constantly being fed to people from day 1 and shaping their opinions. These parents are trying to distance the child a little bit from the norms.

        1. on an unrelated note, I landed at your blog completely by chance, and I’m really glad I did! This is a fantastic blog. (And if you were wondering, I’m the same “guest” in this thread)

  5. I’ve been trying to articulate how I feel about this for a little while and you have hit the nail on the head perfectly! I am all for parents objecting to certain ways society may try and force our kids into gender roles with boy or girl-specific toys, for example, but this is totally ridiculous. It’s making a statement for statement’s sake. 

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