My Top 5 Pranks to Play on Your Other Half

In all fairness, my husband doesn’t go out that much.  But when he does, after my daughters gone to bed and I’ve opened the wine, I can get a bit bored; which always leads to mischief.

Here are my top 5 pranks I play on him when he stumbles through the door:

1.) Cling Film the front door – this is one of my all time favourites!  You will need a Costco-sized roll of cling film.  I couldn’t stop laughing the entire time….but my only advice, make sure you place it on the right side of the door; bearing in mind which way the door opens.

2.) A dash of Lego – I can’t take credit for this one, I think I originally got the idea from Daddacool.  Sprinkle Lego on the floor along the route that they’re most likely going to take after they take their shoes off.  Then turn off the lights, head of to bed and wait for the yelps!

3.) Place a hairbrush, preferably one with hard bristles, under the duvet on their side of the bed.  Ouch!

4.) Rearrange the furniture – unfortunately this isn’t really possible in our bedroom as it’s, so small and stacked with furniture.  The most I could probably do would be to put the pillows on the opposite end of the bed.

5.) Duct tape the kitchen tap but leave a small gap between the tape, towards the front so when they turn it on it sprays them all down the front.

I’ve now run out of new pranks so would appreciate any you have to share.

Have a well deserved Bank Holiday!

 

 

 

 

 

How did you tell your other half you were pregnant?

Parts of this may horrify some of you.  I never planned on having children and believed that the batteries in my biological clock were well and truly dead.  However, on Christmas Day 2006, after we drank our way through everything in the house including the duty free cupboard we got a bit carried away!

Late January, I knew in the back of my mind that I was pregnant (sore boobs, etc) so I went off to a chemists, one where no one would recognize me, and bought a pregnancy test.  I came home, peed all over my hand and to my great relief it was negative.  But, I knew it must be wrong, so off I went again to get another one and no big surprise this one was positive!

I was in utter shock and in my true fashion I wandered to the shop at the end of the road and bought 20 fags and 4 of the largest tins of beer I could get.  I then returned home smoked all the fags and drank all the beer and called my best friend in tears somewhere in the middle.  She managed to calm me down.

When hubby arrived home I had the fire going and made him sit down in front of it.  Then I presented him with a present…gift wrapped and all.  Inside were these:

It took him a moment, but he was over the moon and then……I passed out!

So how did you tell your other half?

Please note:  I did give up all this silly business during my pregnancy!

Mr. and Mrs.

Loads of people have been doing adorable interviews with their kids.  I wanted to take part, but unfortunately my daughter is still too young.  So instead, I’ve decided to interview my husband Mr. and Mrs. style. Not very original I know.

He only got 4/10.  I do need to give him some slack though. We married after knowing each other for only11 months and that was less than 4 years ago, so in a lot of ways we’re still getting to know each other.

Feel free to do one yourself; I’d love to see your results. You could even interview your cat like The_Moiderer!

1.) What year was I born?

Oh sh*t!  Let me think….1973. Wrong. Would have been good if you’d remembered this when we were being interviewed by immigration.

2.)How much do I weigh?

Am I allowed to answer that…10.5 stone.  Close enough

3.) What size shoes do I wear?

Get those blooding things of the sofa (my Uggs)…7.5.  Wrong again.  They’re 8s

4.) What is my favourite book?

Oh, that guy that died.  The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. Correct

5.) What is my favourite TV Programme?

The Jungle One…I’m a Celebrity.  Wrong.  I do enjoy it but it’s not my favourite.  Would have accepted Glee, Desperate House Wives, or House.

6.) What was my first job?

Working in a Restaurant.  Wrong.  Don’t think you can call McDonald’s a restaurant.

7.) What do I find most annoying about you?

I forget things…..wrong.  Told you, you never listen!

8.) Marmite; love it or hate it. Correct.

I hate it.  I’d rather chew my own toenails.

9.) What is my speciality in the kitchen?

Kraft Dinner (Macaroni and cheese in a box)…wrong again…making a mess or ruining dinner is my speciality.

10.) Would I rather be sober in a crowd of drunks or drunk in a crowd of sober people?

Drunk in a crowd of sober people.  Correct.  Well that was a no brainer wasn’t it!