Mediocre Mum

When are you having another baby?

From the day that my daughter was born people have been asking me when I’m having another.  During the first year, when people asked, I would get the overwhelming urge to punch them in the chops! My husband was never coming near me again!  However, as time went on I warmed to the idea but now that she’s 4 and I’m nearly 40 I’m not convinced.

I know people don’t mean malice, but I do think they need a friendly reminder to think before they speak.  There may be two really good reasons that people haven’t had any more children.

a)      They’ve made a conscious decision not to have any more due to age, finances, concerns for the environment, emotional state; they don’t like kids and/or they don’t need anyone to look after them in their old age and are blissfully happy with one.

b)      Or they haven’t been able to!

Just think next time!  A little frontal screening goes a long way!

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Comments

4 responses to “When are you having another baby?”

  1. Rebecca Emin Avatar
    Rebecca Emin

    I have 3 children and a stepdaughter and people STILL ask me if we will have any more. I remember the day I had my daughter (now 9) someone asked me when I was having the next one. And then when I was pregnant the second time there was the assumption from so many that I would want a boy. No discussion. The implication that I would be disappointed if it was another girl. (I didn’t give two hoots, I was just hoping for a healthy baby.)

    I know a lot of people that apply to your second reason above. For that reason alone, people should think before they ask those sorts of questions.

    Reply
  2. julesey10 Avatar
    julesey10

    I hate how people pressume! My auntie said last week ‘oh whens ur next’ When I tried to wriggle out of it and said oh I don’t think there’ll be any more I got ‘Oh how ridiculous, you’re young fit and your little boy needs a sibling his age’ I felt like crying. Then 3 further times that day she mentioned how having no more was selfish of me and maybe I’d be lucky and get twins next time! Ugh
    3 weeks post miscarriage and have been trying for over 18mths to no avail and my state of mind is cracking with everyone being pregnant and people commenting on whens my next so that was my wanting to punch someone in the chops moment. Either that or curl in a ball sobbing! Morons.
    You’re right people should think!!!!! Whether its your choice to have no more or because its just not happening its not their business.argh. Pet peev!

    Reply
  3. Muddling Along Avatar
    Muddling Along

    Totally agree – we get a lot of chat about whether we’ll have a third which has been particularly hard to deal with this year in the wake of 2 miscarriages and a lot of trying to have another.

    My particular worst is people saying they don’t want us to have another because they won’t be able to cope with another possible bad pregnancy – I mean what???

    Reply
  4. wendy Avatar
    wendy

    What used to drive me mad was when people (mainly people I hardly knew!) would ask if my 2nd pregnancy had been planned or not!! I fell pregnant again 4 months after my first child and was a little surprised but delighted to say the least as my daughter was very much wanted! You then walk away feeling like a silly teenager whose just had a telling off instead of a capable mother of two! People are so rude and ignorant…..and very insensitive especially as a woman could have lost a baby….

    Reply

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