I know that the English are weird with their pickled eggs, eggy bread and squash but who in their right mind would design an ice skating rink that resembles a giant plastic cutting board and then strap a couple of butter knives on their feet! We all know that plastic cutting boards can dull knives.
The thing is I can skate, not brilliantly, but I can. I started when I was 3 and at one point my mother was the President of the Ice Skating Club. That is me on the left.
However, when I took my daughter skating this morning I could barely stand up let alone do a few strokes and heaven forbid a Camel Spin or a Double Salchow, which at my age would’ve been a bad idea anyhow. The skates were dull and I looked like a duck walking on a frozen pond. Luckily, I could feign the doting parent and propped myself (safely) up against the edge to take this video.