My Top Ten Mother’s Day Gifts for Fun Mum’s

Mother’s Day Gift Ideas for Mums with Personality

To avoid disappointment on Mother’s Day I take charge and organise it myself, which usually involves booking us into the pub for lunch.  Every Mother’s Day I seem to get flowers and a card, without sounding ungrateful the only people who really benefit here are Interflora and Hallmark.

Of course I cherish the cards and gifts my daughter makes at school and keep them all, even if I’m not sure what some of them are.

If  you want something done right, do it yourself – unknown

I’ve been trolling the internet to find inspiration for Mother’s Day Gifts, and I felt like I was transported to the 1950s.  Are mum’s really that boring these days?  I don’t do a lot of gardening, I don’t eat chocolate, I’m too busy to read many books, I wear minimal jewellery, baking is not my strong point, I don’t have the patience for jigsaw puzzles and I’m not a Yummy Mummy.

However, I like to think I have a great sense of humour, enjoy practical things and a lover of gadgets.

My Top 10 Gift Ideas for Mother’s Day

You Can’t Scare Me T-Shirt

I’m not sure what occasion or when I would wear this would be good to have in the wardrobe for those days I need a bit more attitude.

Mum T-Shirt

Wine Tasting Gift Set

Is it #wineoclock yet?  I know I like wine but I don’t know a lot about it.

Wine Tasting Gift Set


I really want to put this photo of my daughter on a canvas and put it above my desk as it makes me laugh and would cheer me up when I’m having a stressful day. Picanova is currently offering 72% off canvases so I may treat myself  (offer ends 23rd Mar 14).

Photos on Canvas - Picanova
Say Cheese!


Scratch Map

Prior to children I was a rather intrepid traveler and have lost count of the number of countries I have been to.  I’d like to be able to glance up and remind myself of those good old days.

Scratch Map

Muffin Top Moulds

As I mentioned earlier I don’t often bake, but I would definitely use these as they crack me up.

Muffin Top Moulds

Vineyard Tour, Tasting and Lunch

This sounds heavenly albeit slightly dangerous.

Vineyard Tour and Wine Tasting

Mums Wine Glass

Enough Said!

Mums Measure Wine Glasses
Not On the High Street

Foot Spa

I won’t bore you with the details but I’m struggling with my feet at the moment and this looks blissful.

Heated Foot Spa
Executive Shaving

Smart Crock Pot

This has my name all over it, I love a bit of tech and have an unhealthy obsession with my slow cooker.  It would be fab to be able to control it remotely.

Smart Crock Pot

Diagnostic Code Reader for Cars

There is nothing worse, as a woman, walking into a garage not knowing a lot about cars and having that sinking feeling you are going to be ripped off.  I’d love to be able to diagnose the problem before going in, plus it would save me the £80 for them to run the diagnostics each time

Car Diagnostic Reader


Can someone please give my husband a nudge? TIA

What would you banish to Room 101?

What are your Pet Peeves?While I was on holiday, the lovely Ruth from Geek Mummy challenged me to Room 101.  I honestly had no idea what she was on about.  But once I went through her post and scrolled through the everyone else’s posts on it, I managed to work out what it was.

Apparently it’s a Torture Chamber in George Orwell’s book  1984, which I’ve never read if I’m honest.  Following on from that, there’s a TV programme where celebrities are encouraged to banish their pet hates to Room 101.

I’ve been known to have the odd rant or two, especially if I’ve had wine.  I’ve even been known to pick holes in other people’s arguments even if I agree with them, just for sport!  It’s not one of my best characteristics and I’m working on it.  However, I do love a good debate especially on issues that I haven’t decided on how I feel about it.

As I’m increasingly turning into a grumpy old woman, now that I’m in my 40s, I’m finding it really hard to narrow it down to three.  There is a plethora of things; mostly people who I’d send packing.

Can I help you?

I’m not sure why this winds me up so much.  It may have to do with working in the service industry when I was in university.  When I walk into a shop and if I’m lucky and the young shop attendant doesn’t just look me up and down, tut  and then walk off;  because they assume that I am beyond help when it comes to fashion.

They sneak up behind me with military precision and utter those infuriating words ‘Can I help you?’.  Yes, I’m fairly sure that you are capable of helping me as the store wouldn’t have hired you otherwise and I’m guessing that you have had some training?  Don’t you mean ‘may I help you?’  It takes me all my power not to say ‘yes, I’m sure you can but…….’  I would just end up looking like a deranged person.

Parents who steal your thunder?

I don’t know how many times I’ve seen this.  I know some parents, for whatever reasons, possibly lack of fulfilment on their part,  live vicariously through their children’s achievements.  When my daughter was a baby she didn’t sleep through the night until she was 6 months old.  I had a bottle of Champagne in the fridge waiting to pop it the first time she slept through.

There is nothing worse, than when you haven’t slept in months for someone to skip in refreshed as they’ve had unbroken sleep to say ‘my baby slept through since we brought them home from the hospital’.  It’s like a punch in the stomach.

Or recently, I saw a parent excited that their 5-year-old was just coming off their stabilizers.  It did cross my mind to mention that our daughter never used stabilizers as we went down the balance bike route but I managed to keep it to myself.  But as predicted, some mum, who probably meant well, pipes in saying ‘my child has been riding them without stabilizers since they were 3’.  Why oh, why do they do that?  Whoopee ding, your child is a genius but how does that make the other mum feel?  Within a second they have gone from being excited to deflated.

So please, do think before you speak?  There is nothing wrong with celebrating your child’s milestones but timing is everything.

Chewing gum

Let’s face it, chewing gum is unattractive, there are no two ways about it.  This is true for snotty nosed kids to spotty teenagers to supermodels.  No matter how much you try, even if you do it with your mouth closed,  you’re going to look like a masticating cow or worse a 90-year-old who has given up wearing their dentures at tea time.  It’s disgusting and distracting so just don’t do it!

Sorry guys, but I’d love to hear what 3 things you would send to room 101 and tag 3 others to do the same.


Chicken Ruby

Northern Mum

What are your pet hates?  Please do leave a comment below.



My Top 5 Pranks to Play on Your Other Half

In all fairness, my husband doesn’t go out that much.  But when he does, after my daughters gone to bed and I’ve opened the wine, I can get a bit bored; which always leads to mischief.

Here are my top 5 pranks I play on him when he stumbles through the door:

1.) Cling Film the front door – this is one of my all time favourites!  You will need a Costco-sized roll of cling film.  I couldn’t stop laughing the entire time….but my only advice, make sure you place it on the right side of the door; bearing in mind which way the door opens.

2.) A dash of Lego – I can’t take credit for this one, I think I originally got the idea from Daddacool.  Sprinkle Lego on the floor along the route that they’re most likely going to take after they take their shoes off.  Then turn off the lights, head of to bed and wait for the yelps!

3.) Place a hairbrush, preferably one with hard bristles, under the duvet on their side of the bed.  Ouch!

4.) Rearrange the furniture – unfortunately this isn’t really possible in our bedroom as it’s, so small and stacked with furniture.  The most I could probably do would be to put the pillows on the opposite end of the bed.

5.) Duct tape the kitchen tap but leave a small gap between the tape, towards the front so when they turn it on it sprays them all down the front.

I’ve now run out of new pranks so would appreciate any you have to share.

Have a well deserved Bank Holiday!






How to tell a joke or not?

I am absolutely sh*t at telling jokes.  Firstly, I can never remember jokes when I want to, if I do remember them I often start giggling part way through but worst of all I often forget the punchline which can be hugely annoying.

It looks like this may be hereditary.  We’ve been trying to expand Madame’s repertoire of jokes, beyond ‘what do you call a goat with pants on it’s head?’ which there is no punchline but results in fits of laughter from her.

How hard can it be to tell a Knock-Knock Joke?